my dad is dead.

My dad had many faults. He was not an ideal father. Sometimes he was mean and a lot of times he was selfish. But, in my head, he was perfect. He made really bad choices in his life and didn't learn from his mistakes. But, he was MY dad. He told me once that I made him feel inadequate and unworthly of my love. I'm proud of that because it means I learned what he taught me, to question that which I do not understand, to know why I believe what I do and to stand firm on that belief. My dad tripped and fell along his path and sometimes it took him a long time to get back up. He struggled in life and was unsure of himself. But, he never judged me. I would go to him with questions and problems and ideas and he would listen. Sometimes he would advise and sometimes he would not. He always listened though. He was MY dad and I choose to overlook his shortcomings and misgivings. I choose to always look up to him. I choose to see him as perfect.